She said, “I feel rocked”, ghost-like
I took it for an apt description of me in sorrow
Like many of my visions another sparked by the smile of a woman
Ufff, lonely man fall behind curtains, it’s damn near certain I’ll end up alone
Read a book yesterday in it a woman died at age 46
The author in disbelief how could death happen to someone who hadn’t been kissed
Anxious moments spill into anxious nights then built an anxious man
Double as a clone for my sickness walking, tilting into oblivion
Rocked, but no soft landing for my bottom
nightmare felt like drills burrowing into my jaw
Every decision pulls the nerves that hold man together like god
But I’ve spent what I’ve earned and made mistakes when I said I learned
Rocked, feels like I got socked bottom row of teeth falling out
Dreams, emotions, and the motives stalling out
Bent my fury by the quote said blah blah blah when life happens don’t let go of the rope
Tippy toe by the edge, feel nothing from pinky toe to the neck, stressed, but yes what’s comes next
She laughed, and said “Rocked”
Choked, slammed buried by the end of it all
You know that overwhelming, blaring tune of the past
You know that love soothing the thing that failed to last…rocked…like a lullaby and bliss. Rocked like you put your dreams to the pit. Rocked like after this you’ll never exist. Rocked by the night before, still walking you know zombie-like, edible eating, mushroom trippin’, heave into heathen.
She laughed, and asked, “You know the feeling?”