I left you a voice recording, in it I explained my affliction. I let you know how I saw myself and how that had made me a different person during this time. I asked for peace in my decision as I had myself already come to peace with that decision.
Sharing myself to you and quietly speaking my feelings out.
I am speaking for myself and for the things I love and allowed to create within me a vile tension.
Who knew there would be so much pain in finally being myself.
I grow backwards through the few failures I’m allowed.
I set record on and I started to pour my hell out.
Cliched and sardonic I mentioned I had come full circle with the feeling.
I was done hiding and kind of into being myself. Those voice recordings were played once and never responded to. Guess it’s a lot of nothing to set on someone’s shoulders. Mainly the opportunity of trust once again being holstered. If you can’t love me this way I’d suggest you don’t try another way.
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There is no other way as each one would be pious of the deity I am and the abysmal weight perched on my innards. I hold no judgement or no trouble with your decision. I may be happy at the complete disillusion forced to face me. The uncooperative deceit and the horrible crux I made myself to bare.
Move on and love. In the only way you may know how.
Trust, trust, and trust that things will one day make a bit of sense to you.
That you might have worried once don’t do that again. Don’t stumble out of the wind to try and love me.